Confessions of a Disillusioned Black Girl

Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Year's Eve

8:03 AM | Labels: new years, resolutions, retrospective, thoughts

Let's make it a great night....

I usually write this closer to the end of the day, and while I don't have any big NYE plans, I don't intend to spend it on this computer. So, here we are. Another year has passed. Time to reflect on the past year and time to prepare for the next. While 2011 wasn't terrible for me, I'm still glad to see it go. Wasn't necessarily the best year. However I am grateful that I was able to see it.

So, time to make some promises. Good ol, resolutions. Last year I decided not to make any if I remember correctly. And I held true to that. I figured I'd just go ahead and do whatever I wanted and if I didn't do something, then no big deal. Well, what ended up happening is I pretty much did nothing really. Or at least I felt like I did nothing. I have nothing really significant to say I accomplished last year. (Though I did visit LA and that was one of my things to do). But all in all, 2011 was pretty stagnant for me. So maybe that no resolution thing wasn't the best idea.

So this year I will probably make some resolutions. Exactly what they'll be are to be determined. Not quite sure honestly. So how about this: In 2012 I resolve to do something! I think that'll work. And, I plan to honor as many ~~superstitions~~ traditions as I possibly can. So that means New Years Day I will not be paying any bills, nothing will leave this house before something comes in (including trash), I need a tall, dark and handsome man to be the first one through the threshold, and he should be bearing a gift and I think he's supposed to kiss the person who lives there.....something to that effect....not sure, it's never happened so...yea.... (The likelyhood of that last one happening is slim to none but the Young One is in town so perhaps...). I'll make as much noise as one person can possibly make at the strike of 12 to scare the devil out and open the doors to let the old year go and allow the new year to come in. And I'll finish it off with the traditional southern New Years Day dinner for luck, wealth and prosperity. (Or is it health? *shrugs*). Either way I'm going to bring myself and this house as much luck as possible!

And you know they say whatever you spend New Year's Eve doing is how you'll spend the rest of the year. So all you people with drama, you better let it chill for one day. Enjoy yourself or you'll be dealing with drama all year.

I plan to bring in the new year doing what I hope to spend the next year doing. That includes writing (check), spending time with family (sister's here so check), enjoying friends (some should be over later unless plans change so check), and doing things I like to do (shopping, making jewelry, being creative...which will be a check by the time this post is published). So I think I'm off to a good start.

So while I may not have solid plans for next year I have some plans for today. Time for me to get up and get it moving. To everyone who made it to today, I'm happy that you're here. Let's be thankful we had a chance to know the ones who were not able to make it with us. I wish all of you all the success and happiness the next year can bring.

And if the 2012 predictions end up coming true, it's been one great ride! Peace and blessings to you all. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

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Friday, December 30, 2011

Acting Right

12:00 PM | Labels: acting right, party

After reviewing the previous rules, I felt it is necessary to outline the rules for house parties and other various group functions that occur at a persons place of residence. While many of the rules from Section A do apply, there are several others that need to be addressed.

#1. Never show up empty handed unless instructed to do so. You should always offer to bring something to the party. This goes for frequent visitors and especially for new visitors. For new visitors this is a sort of 'thank you', if you will, to the host for ... I hate to say allow but, allowing you to come into their home. For frequent guests, this is obviously someone you know well, so it's just the nice thing to do.

#2. If you are a guest to the party and do not know the host, do not invite extra people. It doesn't matter if the host has said it's OK or hasn't. AND this goes double if you haven't even told the host you have extra people coming. You are already an extra person. You don't know this host well enough to invite people to their house. Who says the host wants all these strange people to know where they live? And while the host may be open to it, I wouldn't even ask. Let's just say don't do it and leave it at that.

#3. If you are a frequent visitor to these parties, you should at the very least offer to help clean up after functions are done. Many times the host will say that's not necessary. Some will insist that you go home or sit down, but the offer is still a good gesture. And really if everyone cleaned up after just themselves, much of the work is done. Sometimes, simply picking up stray cups, plates, napkins or arranging dishes in a common place is good enough to help take some of the stress off the host after the party is done.

#4. The liquor stays at the hosts house. YOU....DO....NOT....take the bottle you brought over to the house back when you leave. It doesn't matter if it's completely full, never opened, or only has a little bit left. You shouldn't ask to take the bottle back. The only time you leave with the liquor you brought is if the host puts it back into your hands. This is another way of saying 'thank you' to the host for opening up their home.

#5. If you are a visitor to the house party and no one but the person you came with knows you, don't be a wallflower. After you take a moment to assess the situation, mingle with the other guests. Make new friends. Play a game of Spades. At the very least talk to the host. Don't sit on a couch on your phone the entire evening. And most certainly don't be a creeper and just stare at everyone all night from the corner. House parties are probably the lowest pressure situations. Many attendees are already drunk by the time you get there. You don't have to worry about money for food or drinks. It's not about trying to holler at the most people or get a bunch of numbers by the end of the night. It's just fun. Just get in there, meet some new people and have a good time.

#6. Don't eat, drink and run. Don't come to someone's house and eat up all their food, drink all their liquor and then poof like a fart in the wind. It's just rude.

#7. If you break something, offer to replace it. This is someone's house. This is someone's stuff. Don't just hide it either. How would you feel if something in your house just showed up broken the next day? In this instance, even if the host says don't worry about it, I'd still replace it.

#8. This should go without saying but, I'll say it. Don't bad mouth the party or the party goers during, before or after on any kind of social media, or verbally to anyone. That's in such bad taste. Here these people are, many who probably don't know you, offering you a good time and a place to hang out for the evening. Giving of their food, their liquor, their home, and many times themselves. It is incredibly rude to be disrespectful, to their face or behind their back. If you didn't have a good time, then just don't return or leave early. There's absolutely no reason to talk shit. None. What. So. Ever.

With the New Year just a day away, many of you will be either out at parties or visiting other people's home. I thought I would just give out some guidelines and some things to consider as you being to usher in a new time. If you haven't always been the best, it's the perfect time to start anew. As always: Respect yourselves. Respect each other. Put good in and you'll get good out. ♥

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