An honest dialogue about love, life, and everything in-between...

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

No One Else

11:58 AM |

You can only talk to me, me and me....

You know the saying 'if you've never met his friends or anyone from his family you are not his girl'? Well what about the opposite? What if your girl or guy never wants to meet your friends, never wants to meet your family, AND never wants you to see them either. What does that mean? (they're crazy)

This whole, 'it's me or them' attitude is crazy to me. Removing 'distractions' from a relationship will only help in certain contexts. Sometimes, the reason you are not getting the time you want or feel you deserve is because they simply don't want to give it to you. Honestly, if you're relationship is so fragile that it can't take your partner having their own life, no matter what you do it won't survive. And that has nothing to do with the friends or family. So you can try and pull him or her away from them as much as you want to, but you still may not get what it is you're looking for. Besides that, it makes you look childish and insecure.

Even if the family and friends are of an unfavorable crowd, who are you to tell another grown person who they can or cannot hang out with? Especially when it comes to family. Regardless of how bad they are, it is your partners responsibility to deal with them. If the person you are with starts to see family and friends as a problem, and you mean anything to them, trust that they will handle that. You are not a dictator, not a warden, often times you're not even the wife or husband. You can suggest they distance themselves. You can even restrict the time you spend with them. But you simply cannot force your partner to not associate with people that were there before you existed and will be there long after you're gone.