An honest dialogue about love, life, and everything in-between...

Friday, August 31, 2012

Thoughts On The Eve Of Another Birthday

11:30 PM |

Another year gone...

So every year I come to my blog to journal exactly how I was feeling at the turn of another year of life. Usually I'm full of hope and inspiration, feeling positive about the new year to come.  This year, if I'm being true, I gotta say I have no other choice but to be hopeful that this next year is a good one.

This past year was full of it's good and it's bad.  I've gotten a chance to travel to new places, stepped up my jewelry making game, wrote more and started trying to get my mind and body right. But at the same time I made some terrible decisions along the way that I'll be paying for, for a while. There's been a lot of standing in one place. I've lost some people that were dear to me. And let's just say things are no where near as stable as they once appeared to be.  Needless to say this year has been STRESSFUL! Apparently, it's time to make some for real, hard changes.

So, this year, on the eve of my birthday, I'm not as happy as I usually am.  I'm a bit stressed.  I bit worried. A bit sad.  A bit unsettled. A bit unsatisfied. But the sun will rise tomorrow on the start of a new year and I just refuse to wake up feeling this way.  I'll get up, get dressed, and go out with my girls and laugh the night away.  I will eat, drink and be merry.  I'll catch up with my sister, call my grandmother and remind her it's my birthday so she can wish me happy birthday.  I may even get some hot water again this weekend courtesy of my parents and I'll pretend that it's for my birthday and not because I'll actually have to have visitors at my house next week. I'll deal with the real world on the other side of this long, holiday weekend. I'm good a procrastination, so I will stick all these bad thoughts and worry where I put all my deadlines, and to-dos.

So as we say at #1713.....SHOTS UP! Happy birthday to me.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Moment of Simple

1:18 PM |

Here I come to save the day...

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Old Schoolin' With Granny

Episode 1: The Break Up

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Men and Standards

Men ain't said it...

You know there are several conversations I wish we'd stop having.  Are men able to be monogamous? Do all men cheat and why? Can men be trusted? Why can't men commit. Blah, blah, blah, blah-blah. Let's just stop.

Do you know how many men call into these radio shows to basically say that it's within the male primal instinct to go out and be with as many women as he can?  That the bible has shown men being with several women at a time (don't think the fact that the good book has been interpreted by men over the ages has anything to do with that huh? - you don't see everybody turning to Leviticus in their well worn Queen Mary's version of the bible..... I'm just saying). That guys are only motivated by a few things: girls, sex and money. That women have to dumb it down, lower standards in order to be with them. For every person that calls in to dispute the idea that men are just sorry, there are at least 2 men that call in and support the statement.

Why guys? Why do you have such low standards for yourself?  Limiting your values to this supposed raging libidos.  Not believing that you are a man worthy of having one good woman treat you with the respect and the admiration a king deserves.  Feeding into the stereotype instead of actively trying to change it. Why do you allow yourselves to be defined in such demeaning and limiting ways? Why do you settle for such shallow standards?

It's no longer funny.

It's not a joke.

It's just sad.

Why? Because many of you are actually beginning to not only believe the bullshit, you're so happy playing along with these ideas that you are perpetuating them to such a degree that the young men coming up have no other standard to live by. It's bad enough this idea is a primary theme in our media.  There are so many absentee fathers out there, that the kids can't look up to them. There are fewer and fewer male teachers in the classrooms that they can identify with. Where are they supposed to see another side of life?

And instead of always harping on the fact that women only want to date doctors and ballers, why not try to excel at your current job? Why not push for that promotion? Be the best you can be at what you do. Elevate yourself to a higher ground. Why always tell the world to lower their expectations?

Until you begin to set higher standards for yourself, you cannot expect anyone else (especially women) to have any other than the worst/lowest expectations for you.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Not A Good Look

1:12 PM |

The Silly Chics...

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a stupid girl.  I hate them with all my heart and soul! More than spiders, more than smelly trash, more than the sound of nails scraping across a chalkboard.  Hate. Hate. Hate. Stupid Girls.

You would think that something like this wouldn't get to me so bad.  Who cares what stupid girls do, they're stupid.  But see the problem is - this disease is spreading. Intelligent chics are becoming more and more rare. And what were are left with is nothing but mindless, bobble-headed, wanna-be barbies.

So.  I was asked, what exactly is a stupid girl.  We'll here's my list of what would categorize you (or the woman you are dating) as a stupid girl.

  1. Mindlessly follows the crowd
  2. Thinks her own ignorance is funny
  3. And has no desire to try and be any smarter
  4. Is self-centered and self-absorbed
  5. Inconsiderate and rude
  6. Only talent is being cute
  7. Shallow
  8. Puts high value on small and shallow things
  9. Demeans and puts down people
  10. Finds enjoyment in other people's insecurities - a bully
  11. Can't do shit.  I mean nothing.  Nothing at all
  12. Finds nothing wrong with belittling her assets or herself to fit in
  13. Or does #11 to find or keep a man
  14. Has no thoughts or opinions of her own
  15. Completely ignorant of her history or culture and is fine with that
  16. Not only does she not have any book smarts, she also has no common sense
  17. Never thinks about future consequences of her actions
  18. Doesn't care about how her actions could potential reflect badly on the people around her or her family
  19. Aspires to be like the reality stars on TV
  20. Always trying to fight someone over something stupid
I just really can't stand them. I really can't. These girls mess the entire game up for EVERYONE! Making it hard out there on a real chic.  And that's just NOT a good look.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Ladies's Man

12:30 PM |

So you say you have a lot of homegirls?  

Do you always have girls coming by your desk at work? Hug every girl you pass in the hallway? Constantly texting your 'little sister'?  You've always gotten along with women better than men? You grew up around women and it just feels natural to always be around them? I can dig that. But I have to be honest. There are so many things a guy can do to turn a good girl off.  One of those many things is constantly have a ton of women around.

You're a just a ladies' man right?  What's so wrong with that? Now the initial reaction would be: Is this girl so insecure that she has issues with you having female friends?  The answer: No.  While there are girls out there that do have that problem (and believe me they'll make that problem known quick, fast and in a hurry), the girls I am talking about are not in that category.  So let's rundown a few reasons why having a ton of women around could prevent you from finding that 'one'.

First, you know how guys say they don't want to 'wife' a girl who is a tramp?  Well, girls don't want to 'husband' a guy who is a flirt.  And let's be real, many of you guys who have all these girls around you are indeed flirts. Some of you probably aren't even aware that you are flirting. And I understand that.  But being flirtatious with every woman you encounter can chip away at even the most secure woman's armor.  Minds can wander and ladies think: If he does this when I'm here, I can only imagine what he does when I'm not. Remember, society has pretty much engrained in most women's minds that you guys are horn dogs that are out there trying to get at any piece of cute available booty that presents itself to you.  And while many woman choose not to believe all men are dogs, that possibility still lurks in the recesses of our minds.

Second, if you're constantly giving all these women this kind of attention, how is a girl who is interested in you supposed to know that you're interested in her? How is she different from any of the other girls you are constantly seen with? She can't figure out if you're single or attached to one of these women.  She can't figure out if you'd even be interested in her any more than you are these other girls. If she can't figure some of these things out, you are pretty much guaranteeing that this good girl will never truly approach you or let her interest be known.

Third, that's just entirely too much competition.  Please understand that the ratio of men to women out there is 143.4 million women to 138.1 million men.  We already gotta compete with sports, your job, your friends, your mother, and now this never ending stream of thirsty chicas? That usually comes with the potential for a lot of unnecessary drama. No thank you.

Unfortunately we live in a society where perception is all that matters.  And wether or not you're just an honest to goodness good guy, if you're always hanging out with a bunch of women you can be sending the signal that you're a man whore (or batting for the other team).  That ladies man thing may score you major points with the fellas, but it totally downgrades your stock amongst the female traders.

Just thought you should know.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Random Thought

12:00 PM |