An honest dialogue about love, life, and everything in-between...

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Who's The Better Communicator?

12:00 PM |

Men or Women...

True or False: Women are better communicators than men. Many would say true. Well, forever being the antagonist, I have to disagree. Just because women are more open to talk and more open to share doesn't necessarily make them better communicators.

Men will often tell you exactly what they are thinking. If they say they're thinking about nothing, they 95% of the time really and truly mean nothing. If they say they like it, they do (or at least do enough not to get themselves in trouble by saying otherwise). The only time they don't really say what they mean is when they are really uncomfortable talking about whatever the subject may be. For whatever reason. Remember part of a measure of a man is being true to his word and standing by what he says. So for the most part, if he says it (and he's a man and not a punk liar) you can believe he is communicating exactly what is on his mind. If he tells you nothing, and I mean nothing. You can't get him to speak up or out about anything...then there's a problem. And not with communication.

Women on the other hand may speak more, but I feel they often fail at communication efforts. For example, some will say we want a man to be the head of the household yet undermind his every efforts to do so. Some will say we want a man to be adventurous in the bedroom then freak out if he tries something different. I think, in general, many women don't know what we really want. We can be quick to see what we don't want, but explaining what we do want can be a struggle. We often have a tendency to send mix messages. Yet get mad when the man doesn't understand. Fall back on the whole, 'you know what I meant' idea. When really we don't even know what we mean.

Women, because biologically we are more emotionally charged beings, do have a tendency to fly off the handle. When we get mad we can shut down when things don't turn out the way we want. Ignore things we don't want to hear. Close ourselves off to other opinions. Yell, scream, throw stuff. How is that communicating?

Please believe this is not meant to apply to all men or all women because we know statistically there are variants in every population. However, if I am looking at the blanket statement 'Women are better communicators than men', I just honestly have to disagree.