An honest dialogue about love, life, and everything in-between...

Monday, August 2, 2010

"New Love"

10:01 AM |

Boo vs Leech....

Show me a man that went from being a professional or a good student, lively, prompt, dedicated, dependable, etc. to flaky, depressed, stressed, inconsistent, etc. and I'll show you a man caught up in this "new love". While it affects both genders, new love is this strange phenomena is seen most commonly when in a man enters a relationship with a woman and his professional life and personal life go to shit. Usually indicated substantial and sudden changes in personality and habits rendering a once good individual into a shell of his former self.

Now I get it. When a relationship is fresh and new you want to spend all your time with this new love. Nothing else seems to matter. It's all about that person. However, the first time you have to sit down with the big man in charge (boss, teacher, parents) and atone for your fuck ups should be an eye-opener and often it's not.

At some point you have to determine wether or not this person has your best interests at heart. It's very possible that the woman you are with is suffering from this new love phenomena just as much as the man is. If that is the case then the two need to sit down and really make sure that what they are doing doesn't distract or deter either from important things in their lives.

However it's important to note that not everyone that says they love you actually loves you. Not everyone has your best interest in mind. There are plenty of women(and men) that like to attach themselves to successful men(or women), suck all the marrow out of their bones and leave them brittle and broken on the side of the road. That's the leech, the succubus, the soul-stealer, the man eater. That's the kind you have to watch out for. And TRUST they are everywhere! If at any point your new love encourages you not to do something that a) makes you money b)keeps you from doing important work or c) keeps you from spending time with your family (even if your mom has a re-occuring role on Maury) that is a HUGE red flag.

In short, if a person is down for you, they are down for you. That includes your studies, your paper chase, and all of the other things that were important to you before you boo-ed up. And your true 'boo' will do NOTHING that prevents you from being successful. Remember EVERYONE shows their true colors, you just have to be awake enough to see them.

Side note to the fellas: If your girl is trying to run you, tell you want to do, keep you from handling business.....GROW A PAIR, and tell that chic BACK UP and let you HANDLE YOURS!! BE A MAN!


D-Redd said...

Can we talk about red flags???
You are so on point!!!
Especially that thing about not wanting you to spend time with family and friends.
MAJOR red flag!

And you're right. Both parties have to 'stay woke' as my girl Badu says. One can only do what you allow.

Once you give up your power, to have to scratch and bite to get it back.

Love should feel good and build you up not make you feel like road-kill!

Miss_A said...

I just hate to see people with big personalities turn into this shell of a person because they are in a relationship. I've seen entirely too many people get their soul sucked away by another who really could give to s#!ts about you. You shouldn't have to hit the bottom to realize you're falling.

D-Redd said...

The problem is you're denying the fall until you hit the bottom.

Then it's like, 'WTF??!!'...