An honest dialogue about love, life, and everything in-between...

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Checking In

10:35 AM |

You should call me....

The other day I was listening to the Doug Bank's show and they were discussing wether or not couples had to 'check in' with one another when out away from their partner. Of course this discussion is most often presented in the context of men calling their women to let them know what's going on and what time they'll be home. But it can often (but not really) be in the reverse. Typically the women believe that if the men aren't in the streets 'doing wrong', then why is it a big deal to call and let them know where they are, who they're with, what they're doing, what time they're coming home. Men's response typically is: I'm GROWN!

I think it all depends on the context of the situation. For example, if you had plans to meet up with your girl after you've hung out with your boys (or whatever it is you were planning to do that day) and the activity runs long, then yes, you should call her and let her know. It's rude to have her (or anyone) sitting waiting on you.

But I will say, that if you live with your significant other, you'll have more of an obligation to come on/tell them when you're coming home, than most. You don't want your boo worried about you being in an accident or somewhere lying in a gutter hurt. Plus if you're not coming home, where are you spending the night?

But if you had no plans to connect, you've already talked for the day and you get a little busy I think it's completely your choice wether or not you call your partner and let them know what's going on. If you do, then that's sweet because you truly didn't have to. You can always talk to them the next day, or fill them in later. It doesn't mean you're out there doing wrong. I think that's where a lot of the trust factor comes in.

This is a debate that has been and will probably continue to go on for ever. I think that no one should feel obligated to 'check in' with their significant other, nor should you expect or be expected to. There's absolutely no reason for you to feel like you have to keep tabs on your partner. That just leads to a miserable relationship filled with paranoia, control issues, jealousy and deception.